Your dog

Dear Vanessa,

I hope this email finds you well. While you were at work today, your dog started barking and it really pissed me off. I like to think I am a patient man, but it was a stressful day at work and there was a lot of traffic on the way home. I guess what I'm trying to get at is I had to use your computer to look up internet pornography. I trust that you'll not remove my bookmarks. Thanks for your consideration.

Srsly,
Dan